AUDIENCE FOR: Jason Todd

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[guestservices]

Dinner's pushing your luck.

[unrecked]

[He sort of throws both hands up in surrender and resignation as he leads into the library.]

I feel like a little kid being walked to the bus stop. [He glances back.] It surprise you any?

How big I got from being a skinny runt.

[This doesn't sound smug at all. It sounds genuinely curious actually.]

[guestservices]

[they pause because like, are you asking them to evaluate your tallness or buffness.]

Careful, the way you put that almost makes me feel like I need an adult in the room. Anyway, I am aware of the existence of something called puberty, actually.

[it is a little weird looking up at jason instead of down, even if they're not too chuffed about it because they know they're not a tall male in the first place. but yeah, jason sure did hit a growth spurt.]

[unrecked]

[Both. Evaluated him. (no)

This makes him laugh a little.] Sort of feels like I almost missed it. [He did mentally.

Which is why he is so immature.]

[guestservices]

... You know what, I can see it.

[yeah.]

[unrecked]

[He pretends to be offended.]

What the hell is that supposed to mean?!

[guestservices]

As they say, ignorance is bliss.

[unrecked]

[looks at the card of them he gets later and nods]

You keep that up, and I'm going to give you a hug.

[This threat is empty.]

[guestservices]

My threat of cutting off your dick still stands.

[unrecked]

Sheesh. You try to be nice to a guy...

[As if Lepus isn't literally right there.]

[guestservices]

[jason might get the sense that they're raising an eyebrow.]

You, nice? Are you sure you're capable of that?

[unrecked]

You’re the last person who gets to tell me that, pal.

[If he was less of a nerd, maybe he would throw a book. But he doesn’t.]

[guestservices]

[fuckin nerd

they hold their hands up, pacifying.]

Hey, I'm allowed to call the kettle black.

[unrecked]

[SHUT UP]

Just because you've got experience?

[guestservices]

[cheerfully but in a way that's, like, flippant—]

Because I fully accept that I'm a hypocrite.

[unrecked]

[He actually looks playfully shocked! Like! WOW! He sort of grabs his chest. Leans on a bookshelf.]

Lepus? Admits they're a hypocrite?!

[guestservices]

[jason,]

Try not to fall over and bang your head from the shock. Your underdeveloped brain probably can't handle losing any brain cells.

[unrecked]

[Look.]

Alright, what did I tell you about being an asshole?

[The more they are an asshole, the more Jason is at home and fond.]

[guestservices]

Must've forgotten already.

[STOP]

[unrecked]

[fucking lepus]

I thought you said I was the one with an underdeveloped brain? Tch.

[guestservices]

Maybe I'm still going through puberty, hmm? You don't have that excuse.

[unrecked]

One minute, you're not a kid, then next you are. Make up your mind, will you? I don't know how you didn't drive the other me crazy. Maybe you did.

[guestservices]

He hated me, actually.

[for the record this is said with seemingly complete sincerity because lepus knows jason didn't but this jason doesn't know that?]

[unrecked]

[He sort of looks at them because while this might be true for a situation, he is unfortunately still Jason Todd.

He knows himself. There’s no way that Jason couldn’t like this fuck like he also likes this fuck. Not unless Jason was a pod person.

But he doesn’t say anything.]

Oh yeah? Must have deserved it.

[guestservices]

[A POD PERSON also god what does he have to do, wave a knife around at jason too??]

Maybe he had the sense not to hang around trash.