[she goes very, very tense, when they reach to take her hands, because they are bones. like, she doesn't move at all, or anything, because her brain gives her like two conflicting orders that are let someone help and yank your hands away as fast as possible and she just gets stuck.]
they. just move their hands, up a little, to take them. they don't even hesitate to bridge the gap when she tenses, and they just step a little closer. the black wings at their back, which had been tucked close to their back fan outwards immediately, as if to block out prying eyes, to block out light.
they don't go any further to pull her hands away. instead, they just stay like that for a second, shadowy black palms against pale white bone, but the softness in that voice comes with conviction, too. ]
[she was doing fine with ignoring it before. she just didn't look. she had her freakout in the morning, and then she calmed down, and handled it. nobody touch, nobody look.
she's - embarrassed. nothing scares lup, nothing ever has. but she still has nightmares about the thing that made her this way, and when it manifests, it's a nauseating mix of horror and shame. it's alright, they say, and they're still mostly a stranger, and she mostly just feels like crawling under the bed and never coming back out again.
there's no control in this. there never is, in these games.]
[ they just stay like that for the moment, holding on but not moving, not pushing any further. the wings at their back curl a bit. ]
Mm. [ the noise is quiet, agreeing. ] Situation's not. This, the hotel's - the shitty way it does stuff like this, that's fucking not.
[ the words come with a little less bite than their usual swears, but that quietly fierce intensity doesn't leave them. there's heat to it, like they're a little angry, but it's not with her. ]
... but you are. [ alright. ] This -- [ they don't let go, but their thumb sweeps briefly across one of her palms. ] --is temporary. It's just a stupid, cruel way to try and make you suffer. That doesn't mean it's you.
she drags in a breath, finally, and struggles, between letting them see the emotional insecurity and trying to be cool. this is hard, for her. but she doesn't pull away, and she doesn't try to move, because not being connected somewhere is worse. she shudders, involuntary, when they brush a thumb across her palm, and looks away.]
Right. [she says, finally.] No, I - know that.
[she can't quite show a blush like this, but the way her ears are pressed back and the way she can't meet their gaze probably gets across the impression that she's embarrassed by losing her cool.]
[ there's that quiet, insistent worry again, maybe even more so as she takes a deep breath and as she shudders, but they don't let go. too bad you finished that emotional vulnerability task already, huh?
she can see their veil shift a bit - they're looking up, maybe, but it returns back to its normal position, and they just stay that way, holding her hands gently in theirs, not faltering even an inch. something stable.
and with a little wryness, they say - ] I woke up this morning and thought I was losing my mind. Nearly stabbed myself with these on accident. [ a gentle click of the claws together. ] And that's just my reaction, let alone someone who's been through it already the way you were.
[ that temporary lightness there fades, though, and more solemnly and seriously: ]
... You want me to forget it, I'll forget everything second I leave this room. I'm pretty good at that. [ they say, and then, a little more - it's not quite hesitant, but a little tentative, like they're trying to find the right thing to say. ] ... but until then, will you let me help you?
they... huff, and after a moment, release her hands, letting her take them back if she'd like. something across their wings ripples, a strange, shivery motion, but they let it go, and reach into their sleeve, feeling around for something in the hammerspace.
maybe most noticeable of anything, is that they are not as jokey as usual, either. they seem a little - not angry, but frustrated under all of that worry, somewhere.
eventually, though, they come out with... a scarf! it's pretty, a dark blue color embroidered with stars, and they stay mostly quiet as they come back over and move to stand behind lup. she'll hear their wings flutter a bit so they hover off the ground enough that they can get a little height advantage and get to work helping to pull back her lava hair.
and it's a long moment before they speak again, but when they do, it's very quietly. ]
... Your question the other day. [ ... ] We've got a lot in common.
Edited (bruh i keep opening dw and seeing parts of my tag gone ) 2022-06-21 20:27 (UTC)
[oh, that is pretty, though. she doesn't protest, just keeps her eyes closed for a long moment. she's got her hands pulled to her chest, hidden under the robes, and she's running through all of her memories, all the ones that keep her stable.
her hair being out of her face helps. for the first time in a while, not being touched helps. if she doesn't have to look, she forgets it's there. that's the only way to get through this week.]
... I gotta be honest, I don't remember the question. [she says, finally.]
[ they hesitate for a moment, as they're carefully combing their clawed fingers through the lava, pulling it back - working with it like the liquid it is, creating a container with the scarf to more or less pour it into.
there's a few more beats of quiet before: ]
... You asked me if I was dead. Figured, the least I could do is answer. [ no jokeyness about the third date, either. ] I am.
's not the same experience, but I - [ a brief pause, here, as they're pulling the makeshift hair lava turban scarf up carefully. ] ... you're not alone. 's all.
[ they agree, quieter. the light from the lava flickers a bit across their veil as they are tying the knot on the little scarf to make sure nothing escapes - she can catch a glint of their eyes, light refracting briefly across. ]
Lup, I -
[ ... they stop themselves, after that, and then shake their head, tying the knot. she has something like this now, but starrier. ]
... There's something else, too, but I don't think I can tell you that yet. Maybe another time.
[ as they land back down gently on one foot, they reach into their sleeve, and pull out something else - a pair of white gloves. ] Here.
Yeah - yeah. [ they - laugh, a little, a huff, and duck their head, shaking it. ]
I will. I promise. [ a beat. ] Lemme know if you want to borrow any more clothes.
[ they seem a little less vibratey now too, as lup is starting to come down just a little. the wings at their back come down a bit, and they're able to return that little lightness with some levity of their own.
...anyway: ]
... You wanted to ask me about something, right? We can talk business, if you want.
I'm... no, I'm okay. [with her hair out of her face and the gloves secure, she seems a little less like she's going to throw up or cry. maybe she's a bit wigged out still, but it'll pass.
she fiddles with the gloves, and then makes her way over to sit down on the bed.]
Um, sure. Sorry, I don't want to, like - do the whole only using you for my own gain thing, I hated when people did that to me. [but she also would rather talk about literally anything else than her station trauma at the moment, so business is as good of an escape as any.]
I actually have two questions. The first, um, though. Can I show you something and ask you if you recognize it at all?
[ oh! they look at the paper, and then they laugh. ]
Haha, oooohh, Gems must've taken this from somebody during a meeting... [ the voice is very much "oooooh someone's in trouble". ] Where'd you even find this?
's weird. [ re: emet, anyway. ] You guys didn't find anything like that on yours, right?
And...If I had to guess, yeah. I was probably asleep.
[ they snort a little, glancing at her ear flicks before passing the paper back. ] I love Gems, but man, they can talk. You ever have to sit in on a meeting with a detailed lecture about whether toilet paper in the hotel should be over or under and the benefits of each position?
Nope. Just little, uh... amulets? I didn't really recognize the pattern on it.
[it's on her desk, though, and she gestures vaguely to it.
as for the mention of gemini, there's a pause where her expression shifts into something stupid and soft. probably not because of the namedrop specifically, just the description reminds her of...]
Hah. Yeah. Greed was just like that. [she picks at her gloves.] Miles.
aquila does glance over at the amulet, getting up to go check it out...? no one came to talk to them about the cyoa. :(
though at the mention of this greed or miles, aquila teases, ] Seems like you guys were pretty close.
I don't mind people like that at all. Maybe without the meetings, but, even if Gems nags me about... basically everything, even though I've not done anything wrong, ever, they're coming from a good place. They've got a good heart. Sure your person did too.
[it is there, i'm too lazy to go get the picture of it.]
Miles is one of the best men I've ever known. [she says, ear flicking.] He doesn't deserve to be held hostage for the stuff I have to do, but... I guess it makes sense. He and I tried really hard to give the people at the station a fighting chance, even though we weren't supposed to.
[ugh. her heart aches.]
I'm glad he didn't show up on the excursion we went on. Not that, uh. That stopped them from using other people to fuck with me, but whatever.
[ yeah because then i would have had to rp miles and we all know that's not happening
they peek at it a bit! but don't open it because they're polite. (?) and... something about that last bit gets them to huff a little fondly, shaking their head. ] Sounds like it. Would like to meet the guy, if he's anything like Gems.
[ at the mention of the excursion, though, they set the amulet back down, and come back over. they're still not quite sitting down, but, at least lean against the bed. ]
...your brother, I'm guessing, right? [ aquila makes a softly displeased noise - you can almost feel the distaste for that. ]
[thanks for not opening it but also gu yun is in there so congrats]
Oh, sure. Sure, some, um, some shitty tiger person turned into a girl Rupert knows and ripped Taako's heart out. And then the hosts sucked the life out of my - [...] -- my, um, a person I was close to at the station in front of me before that, so it was great. Just a real rousing success for the good old mental health.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
guestservices) wrote2022-06-09 12:18 pm
no subject
no subject
they. just move their hands, up a little, to take them. they don't even hesitate to bridge the gap when she tenses, and they just step a little closer. the black wings at their back, which had been tucked close to their back fan outwards immediately, as if to block out prying eyes, to block out light.
they don't go any further to pull her hands away. instead, they just stay like that for a second, shadowy black palms against pale white bone, but the softness in that voice comes with conviction, too. ]
... it's alright, Lup. [ quietly, repetitive. ] It's alright.
no subject
she's - embarrassed. nothing scares lup, nothing ever has. but she still has nightmares about the thing that made her this way, and when it manifests, it's a nauseating mix of horror and shame. it's alright, they say, and they're still mostly a stranger, and she mostly just feels like crawling under the bed and never coming back out again.
there's no control in this. there never is, in these games.]
It's not. [she says, voice terse.]
no subject
Mm. [ the noise is quiet, agreeing. ] Situation's not. This, the hotel's - the shitty way it does stuff like this, that's fucking not.
[ the words come with a little less bite than their usual swears, but that quietly fierce intensity doesn't leave them. there's heat to it, like they're a little angry, but it's not with her. ]
... but you are. [ alright. ] This -- [ they don't let go, but their thumb sweeps briefly across one of her palms. ] --is temporary. It's just a stupid, cruel way to try and make you suffer. That doesn't mean it's you.
no subject
she drags in a breath, finally, and struggles, between letting them see the emotional insecurity and trying to be cool. this is hard, for her. but she doesn't pull away, and she doesn't try to move, because not being connected somewhere is worse. she shudders, involuntary, when they brush a thumb across her palm, and looks away.]
Right. [she says, finally.] No, I - know that.
[she can't quite show a blush like this, but the way her ears are pressed back and the way she can't meet their gaze probably gets across the impression that she's embarrassed by losing her cool.]
no subject
[ there's that quiet, insistent worry again, maybe even more so as she takes a deep breath and as she shudders, but they don't let go. too bad you finished that emotional vulnerability task already, huh?
she can see their veil shift a bit - they're looking up, maybe, but it returns back to its normal position, and they just stay that way, holding her hands gently in theirs, not faltering even an inch. something stable.
and with a little wryness, they say - ] I woke up this morning and thought I was losing my mind. Nearly stabbed myself with these on accident. [ a gentle click of the claws together. ] And that's just my reaction, let alone someone who's been through it already the way you were.
[ that temporary lightness there fades, though, and more solemnly and seriously: ]
... You want me to forget it, I'll forget everything second I leave this room. I'm pretty good at that. [ they say, and then, a little more - it's not quite hesitant, but a little tentative, like they're trying to find the right thing to say. ] ... but until then, will you let me help you?
no subject
anyway, she keeps looking away.]
... Okay. [she sounds vaguely resistant still, stiff. she doesn't even feel like joking about it. poor aquila is doing their best.]
no subject
they... huff, and after a moment, release her hands, letting her take them back if she'd like. something across their wings ripples, a strange, shivery motion, but they let it go, and reach into their sleeve, feeling around for something in the hammerspace.
maybe most noticeable of anything, is that they are not as jokey as usual, either. they seem a little - not angry, but frustrated under all of that worry, somewhere.
eventually, though, they come out with... a scarf! it's pretty, a dark blue color embroidered with stars, and they stay mostly quiet as they come back over and move to stand behind lup. she'll hear their wings flutter a bit so they hover off the ground enough that they can get a little height advantage and get to work helping to pull back her lava hair.
and it's a long moment before they speak again, but when they do, it's very quietly. ]
... Your question the other day. [ ... ] We've got a lot in common.
no subject
her hair being out of her face helps. for the first time in a while, not being touched helps. if she doesn't have to look, she forgets it's there. that's the only way to get through this week.]
... I gotta be honest, I don't remember the question. [she says, finally.]
no subject
[ they hesitate for a moment, as they're carefully combing their clawed fingers through the lava, pulling it back - working with it like the liquid it is, creating a container with the scarf to more or less pour it into.
there's a few more beats of quiet before: ]
... You asked me if I was dead. Figured, the least I could do is answer. [ no jokeyness about the third date, either. ] I am.
's not the same experience, but I - [ a brief pause, here, as they're pulling the makeshift hair lava turban scarf up carefully. ] ... you're not alone. 's all.
no subject
Oh. [is all she says at first, but then the hair comes up off her neck entirely, and she glances at them over her shoulder carefully.]
... Well, it'd probably be pretty hard to replicate my circumstance exactly, for sure. [she says, absently.] Good to know.
no subject
[ they agree, quieter. the light from the lava flickers a bit across their veil as they are tying the knot on the little scarf to make sure nothing escapes - she can catch a glint of their eyes, light refracting briefly across. ]
Lup, I -
[ ... they stop themselves, after that, and then shake their head, tying the knot. she has something like this now, but starrier. ]
... There's something else, too, but I don't think I can tell you that yet. Maybe another time.
[ as they land back down gently on one foot, they reach into their sleeve, and pull out something else - a pair of white gloves. ] Here.
no subject
... Thanks. [she says, finally, taking the gloves. and as she's pulling them on:] Way to leave me hanging.
[but that's a little lighter. or she's trying, anyway.]
Tell me when you can, then, I guess.
no subject
I will. I promise. [ a beat. ] Lemme know if you want to borrow any more clothes.
[ they seem a little less vibratey now too, as lup is starting to come down just a little. the wings at their back come down a bit, and they're able to return that little lightness with some levity of their own.
...anyway: ]
... You wanted to ask me about something, right? We can talk business, if you want.
no subject
she fiddles with the gloves, and then makes her way over to sit down on the bed.]
Um, sure. Sorry, I don't want to, like - do the whole only using you for my own gain thing, I hated when people did that to me. [but she also would rather talk about literally anything else than her station trauma at the moment, so business is as good of an escape as any.]
I actually have two questions. The first, um, though. Can I show you something and ask you if you recognize it at all?
no subject
[ that's a little bit wry, but, after a long moment, they'll come over too, though they don't immediately sit, holding out their hand. ]
Lemme see.
no subject
but - after, she shows them this! a copy of it, anyway.]
no subject
Haha, oooohh, Gems must've taken this from somebody during a meeting... [ the voice is very much "oooooh someone's in trouble". ] Where'd you even find this?
no subject
[her ear flicks.] During a meeting, huh. So this was some of you screwing around?
no subject
And...If I had to guess, yeah. I was probably asleep.
[ they snort a little, glancing at her ear flicks before passing the paper back. ] I love Gems, but man, they can talk. You ever have to sit in on a meeting with a detailed lecture about whether toilet paper in the hotel should be over or under and the benefits of each position?
no subject
[it's on her desk, though, and she gestures vaguely to it.
as for the mention of gemini, there's a pause where her expression shifts into something stupid and soft. probably not because of the namedrop specifically, just the description reminds her of...]
Hah. Yeah. Greed was just like that. [she picks at her gloves.] Miles.
no subject
aquila does glance over at the amulet, getting up to go check it out...? no one came to talk to them about the cyoa. :(
though at the mention of this greed or miles, aquila teases, ] Seems like you guys were pretty close.
I don't mind people like that at all. Maybe without the meetings, but, even if Gems nags me about... basically everything, even though I've not done anything wrong, ever, they're coming from a good place. They've got a good heart. Sure your person did too.
no subject
Miles is one of the best men I've ever known. [she says, ear flicking.] He doesn't deserve to be held hostage for the stuff I have to do, but... I guess it makes sense. He and I tried really hard to give the people at the station a fighting chance, even though we weren't supposed to.
[ugh. her heart aches.]
I'm glad he didn't show up on the excursion we went on. Not that, uh. That stopped them from using other people to fuck with me, but whatever.
no subject
they peek at it a bit! but don't open it because they're polite. (?) and... something about that last bit gets them to huff a little fondly, shaking their head. ] Sounds like it. Would like to meet the guy, if he's anything like Gems.
[ at the mention of the excursion, though, they set the amulet back down, and come back over. they're still not quite sitting down, but, at least lean against the bed. ]
...your brother, I'm guessing, right? [ aquila makes a softly displeased noise - you can almost feel the distaste for that. ]
no subject
Oh, sure. Sure, some, um, some shitty tiger person turned into a girl Rupert knows and ripped Taako's heart out. And then the hosts sucked the life out of my - [...] -- my, um, a person I was close to at the station in front of me before that, so it was great. Just a real rousing success for the good old mental health.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)