I'm genuinely not sure if any of us are from the same world.
Given what Claude told me the other day, I'll be surprised if he doesn't knife me in the back at some point. Unless he's willing to divorce the me he remembers from the me in front of him.
For me it would come down to trust. And that's why I half expect what I do.
... I chose to follow the Golden Deer in the war because Claude is the kind of man to minimise unnecessary death and prioritise survival. And I had an Abyss full of people who were going to be at risk if the fighting made it to Garreg Mach. He thinks enough like I do for me to have enough confidence to follow him into that stupid war.
It’s difficult to put something as delicate as a person’s life in someone else’s hands and expect the best outcome. Call me a control freak if you will, but if my machinations are the thing to fail, then at least I know how to improve it.
Not the healthiest way of dealing with it, I know, but the letting go process is even harder and this isn’t really the best place to be experimenting with it.
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Given what Claude told me the other day, I'll be surprised if he doesn't knife me in the back at some point. Unless he's willing to divorce the me he remembers from the me in front of him.
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Would you, if your positions were reversed?
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[no judgment either way.]
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... I chose to follow the Golden Deer in the war because Claude is the kind of man to minimise unnecessary death and prioritise survival. And I had an Abyss full of people who were going to be at risk if the fighting made it to Garreg Mach. He thinks enough like I do for me to have enough confidence to follow him into that stupid war.
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That makes sense. It sounds like you both are the sort to protect your own.
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I think he's similar.
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And I imagine that will to survive is part of why trust doesn't come easily.
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Not the healthiest way of dealing with it, I know, but the letting go process is even harder and this isn’t really the best place to be experimenting with it.
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Each person is doing what they can to get by in life. It's difficult to fault one for working with what the world gives them.
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Yes, well.
Sometimes that part isn’t pleasant either.
[ … ]
Anyway, I have to go and psyche myself up to be vulnerable. Thanks for the info.
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It's what we're here for.