guestservices | AUDIENCE FOR: Lup

[her ear flicks.]

I kind of figured that. [...] I experienced a memory of theirs, so it gave me some sort of insight, and like, my brother is like this too. Not nearly as much of an asshole, more like uh, a fussy passive aggressive brat, but like, it's similar.

They're like a cat that hisses or scratches at you a lot, but will still let you get close enough to pet it sometimes.

[nodding sagely as if this makes perfect sense. idiot.]

Sounds about right.

... I know we're not supposed to uh, be friends with any of you or whatever and that's fine. [it's like, untrue, she's pretty sure she's friends with some of them even if they insist] But I don't like the idea of them being alone, so.

Something something professionalism, something something lines we aren't supposed to cross...

[they gesture with one hand.]

I don't like the idea of that, either. In my experience, the ones who push people away the hardest are the ones who actually need them the most.

Yeah. That's my experience too.

[a little sigh.]

I compared them to my brother and I could practically hear the stank face they made under that veil.

Mm, well... some people don't like to be compared to other people. It can make them feel like the person doing the comparing is seeing shades of someone else, instead of seeing who they really are.

[dryly:] Okay, well, that'd be fair normally, but I literally am not allowed to know who you all really are, so I don't know how well that holds in this place.

Edited 2022-07-20 03:48 (UTC)

My point was, to them, it might feel like you're acting a certain way around them because you're seeing someone else in them who isn't there, rather than reacting to the person in front of you. Even if you don't know who they are, Lepus is still Lepus, right?

[she looks vaguely annoyed by this.]

Yeah. Sure. That's not - what I was doing, but whatever, I'm pretty used to Lepus taking everything I do as an attack against them, so. Fine.

[gently:]

Even if that's not your intent, some people can interpret it that way. Whether that's the case with Lepus or not I couldn't say for sure, as I wasn't there, but... since you said they made a... "stank face" at the comparison, something about it probably didn't sit right with them.

[a beat.]

What would that sort of face sound like, anyway? ...or was practically being able to hear it just an expression...

[the annoyance just gets worse, and lup opens her mouth to say something, and then she just. shuts her mouth, and shuts off.]

Don't know. It was just like that. [she's short, ears pressed back against her skull.]

...

[vulpecula, watching lup shut down, is giving off concerned vibes.]

...something clearly happened to make you want to ask about how Lepus and I became friends all of a sudden. What happened, Lup?

[she shoves her hands in her pockets. in that same short tone, because she's still annoyed:]

I tried reaching out to them again after they threw me into a wall and put a knife to my neck and they just told me I can't just win their friendship like some sort of prize. [this - very clearly hurt her feelings, but she refuses to admit it.] It doesn't matter. None of you are here to be friends with us. And I don't want to hear another lecture, so save it.

—wait, they did what?!

It was a couple weeks ago, it's fine.

[it's not! probably!]

Throwing someone into a wall and putting a knife to their neck is not fine! What the hell!

[her ear flicks.]

I'm over it. [mostly. she's kind of just internalized that it was her fault so] It was during the week we were just broadcasting our memories, it doesn't matter now.

Clearly not - it's still affecting you!

[they huff]

I'm going to go shove them into a wall and point a blade at their throat, see how they like it.

[

unfortunately, they are in fact creating a shadow portal they should be stopped maybe]

Stop - stop!

[ABSOLUTELY NOT she grabs their wrist.] Stop, don't - fuck this up for me, we finally had one nice conversation and I don't want to ruin it because I tattled on them!

[the shadow portal closes up while it's only half-formed, and vulpecula pauses.]

It's not tattling. If someone talking honestly about what someone else did makes people mad, it's not the fault of the person who talked about it, it's the fault of the person who did the awful thing!

Okay, but they're not going to see it that way. They're going to think I told on them to you.

They're used to me getting mad at them for any number of reasons.

[...but some of the heat is going out of their words the more lup insists.]

[she rubs at her face a little, and then:]

... I don't want anybody to be mad at them. I don't want to be mad at them.

...is it hard not to be, after they did something like that? I'd find it hard not to be mad at them if they did that to me...

I was mad. [she sighs.] But it takes too much energy that I don't have. And I don't want to be one more person that proves them right.

Plus, I have to see them every week.

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