VALET.

[guestservices]

VALET

Today, when Lup is in her bedroom, she will receive a message on her typewriter.

Dear esteemed guest, congratulations on winning our raffle. The grand prize: a way out of this place.
No, not really. As if you'd be that lucky. Hope you're not afraid of heights.

Immediately after she finishes reading the message, a trap door opens underneath her, plunging her into the darkness. When she wakes up at the bottom (?), bones miraculously not broken, she will find herself in a room.

It's a room that she won't have seen before, small and dimly lit. Its appearance is utterly generic, almost empty save for the sofa chair Lup landed in, a coffee table; a lantern on said table along with a box of office supplies and YOU TRIED stickers; a box of keys; and a sofa chair across from her on the other side.

Lepus is lounging on the latter chair, the very picture of casual. They glance over at her.

"Congrats on not dying. This is going to suck for you, so let's get it over with."

They push the box of keys over at Lup, which will allow her to see that each key has the name of a guest at the hotel. Furthermore, Lepus tosses over a paper at her. It reads PARTICIPATION CONTRACT: ADDENDUM.

"Go ahead and sign it. You don't have much of a choice here, after all."

RULES

1. Once a week, the Valet will be called on to carry out duties on behalf of the other guests.
2. They will be able to do both of the following:

2A. Choose the keys of two possible targets. One of them will, at RANDOM, be selected; the Valet will not be informed of which one, though they may be able to determine once the relevant day has passed. If the selected target is targeted for death on Thursday night, they will be granted life at a later time.

2B. Choose the keys of two possible targets. One of them will, at RANDOM, be selected; the Valet will not be informed of which one, though they may be able to determine once the relevant day has passed. If the selected target is voted at trial to be executed, they will be granted life at a later time.

3. Note that these keys are replicas, cannot be removed from the room, and will not grant the Valet actual access to the guests' rooms.
4. The Valet is not to disclose that they are performing these duties. Discussing them with anyone other than authorized Hotel Staff will be considered breach of contract and will result in the death of MILES EDGEWORTH.

N̸A̵V̴I̶G̶A̶T̴I̴O̸N̷.̷

█ LOCATIONS █ STATUSES █ PROFILES █ AUDIENCES
█ REPORTING █ PRIVATE CONVOS █ MURDER

Comments

[guestservices]

It does say in your contract that "they will be granted life at a later time."

[evocationary]

You say this like that's not the most vague shit I've ever heard.

[huff.]

... Fair enough, though. So I assume it'll always be like that.

[guestservices]

Better to live in grief and then be pleasantly surprised than to have false hopes that'll be crushed.

[they shrug again.]

Maybe.

[evocationary]

Maybe. [she sighs out slow.]

Do you know if Clementine's contract still uh, still is upheld? Like, um. She killed Cloud, so her and her hostage are safe? Even if Cloud came back.

[guestservices]

She murdered him, which is what matters. Him coming back later doesn't affect that.

[evocationary]

Okay. Okay, good. [she rubs at her face.]

Another question - is there any way I'm ever going to be able to tell anybody about this, or is it just, like, no, fuck you, you're alone, for the entire time?

[guestservices]

[a shrug.]

Expecting a contract to change after only one week is pretty foolhardy.

[evocationary]

I'm not - saying now. I just wanted to know if it's possible. [she pulls her feet up onto the couch.] Can you be less of a dick for five seconds? Please. This is a request.

[guestservices]

It's kind of my job to be a dick, in case you haven't realized.

[evocationary]

It isn't, actually! The others are plenty nice to me, you snot nosed boob.

[guestservices]

Yeah, but unlike them, I'm not going to put up airs of niceties to conceal the fact that at the end of the day, we're not on your side.

If I was told right now to kill you, I'd do it. You really think it'd be kinder if I held your hand first?

[evocationary]

[she watches them for a second.]

That's a low fucking blow. Which is what I mean. You're not on our side, but you don't have to be this extra. It's exhausting.

[guestservices]

[curtly]

Good. If you want comfort, you have seven other options. After all, like you said, they'll at least give you the courtesy you want, right?

[i, the mod, am so sorry though.]

[evocationary]

[it's okay jan i love you]

... You don't want to be hurt when you have to fuck us over. [she says, but she's not really saying it to them. actually i'm taking this chance to mention that there are lava cracks that open across her skin, as she's talking. congrats.

a sigh.] It's easier to do when you don't care.

Hey, can I request an audience with the Nightman?

[guestservices]

[they'll let her think what she wants.]

You can try yelling at the ceiling if you want—don't actually do that in here—but no, there's no channel for you to request an audience with them.

[evocationary]

Think they'd ever answer if I tried?

[guestservices]

No.

[evocationary]

Not even if I bribe them? [a beat.] What dirt do they have on you, anyway?

[guestservices]

Iiiii'm not at liberty to discuss the details of my employment.

[evocationary]

So that's a yes, they do have dirt on you. Or a hostage. That'd make the most sense.

[guestservices]

Think whatever you'd like. Is it really shocking to think that some people pick up a job to pay the bills?

[evocationary]

Pay the - you pay the bills with an otherworldly murder hotel? [HELLO] Okay. Sure. Sure!

[she huffs, and starts going through the keys.]

... I don't get why we're allowed to do this if you're not on our side.

[guestservices]

[there's a bark of laughter, though mirthless, before they shake their head.]

People have paid the bills with worse.

Anyway, that's something you can ponder, along with deciding your picks for the week.

[evocationary]

[lepus please]

I don't even know who to pick this week. I feel like I struck it so fucking lucky. [stares down at the keys...] You said I can do repeats?

[is she considering trying to put cloud's name down again because the fucking hotel seems to have it out for him? maybe.]

[guestservices]

As long as you don't put down the exact same combo you did last week.