this is a lot, and gemini lets it go, watching, observing, processing. it's a little out of their realm of understanding judging by the way they shift almost uncomfortably, but they don't speak yet.
it takes a few moments of silence, arms folded over their chest, before they pick the best thread to start the conversation with.]
...in the end, Harrowhark, was it real or was it a hallucination after all?
[she looks embarrassed, a bit humiliated. intense daddy issues laid bare. extreme dramatics.
but she takes a deep breath.]
I think he was wrong. I'm not sure how, but I did manage to break into the tomb. [she chews her lip.] In the memory, I realized no one had witnessed me doing so. But that isn't quite right. In this memory, I had forgotten about Gideon. She didn't see what was inside, but...she saw.
I suppose I ought to explain. I was among the heirs who was summoned by the Emperor to become a lyctor, one of his immortal saints. We were meant to study, and prove ourselves, and if we came to understand the theory and the tasks, to ascend. The practice, as it turns out, involves the sacrifice of another living soul. The necromancer absorbs the soul in the moments following death, consumes it, and it becomes a replenishing source of power for all eternity. [...] Only one of us was actually willing to pay such an awful cost.
However, the situation became something other than what the Emperor intended. One of his original lyctors did not wish to see the creation of new ones. She began killing us off one by one, before we even understood what was happening. Gideon, she...could see we weren't getting out. So she killed himself, so that I could use her soul and survive that fight.
Which I did. But even so, even knowing she was dead, I didn't want to consume her. I knew I would destroy what was left of her soul even inadvertently. But I'd theorized that I could prevent the process from continuing if my mind did not remember her.
[jesus christ harrow. okay. cool. they are just...going to think about that and digest it.
surprisingly though it's not really that hard of a concept to grasp? like yes there's a lot about emperors and necromancy and space stuff they aren't aware of, but the core message is there.]
In a way, both of you sacrificed large pieces of yourself to help one another. In order to survive.
...it seems your theory was correct then? [things. seem betterish.]
[it is a lot, but yes - it does all come down to that fairly simple story of two people who care about one another.]
It was my goal, at the station, to save her. So...her soul is no longer in any danger from me. I believe she may live again, and may do so even without my intercession, provided my instructions are followed.
You do strike me as the sort who doesn't back down until goals are met. So...I think I can understand the belief, and the process, as well. Meticulous planning and all.
[they seem like they're going to say something else, but this is a convenient time for another smattering of stardust. horrible.
You walk for a while, and you don’t even know where you’re going. Does it matter? You’re together. It’s always been the two of you, even before it was the three of you. And so it doesn’t surprise you when he speaks again.
“I always figured I was better at stuff than you. Are you mad?”
You shrug. “No. I kinda always thought you were better at everything, too.”
There isn’t any room for argument then as you see a light ahead. You respect his wishes to set him down, and the two of you make your way toward the water. You think he’s behind you, and so you idly comment that maybe the two of you are the same. It isn’t until there’s no reply you realize he’s collapsed.
You run. But then you sit down in the sand side by side and watch the waves.
“…if the world is made of light and darkness…we’ll be the darkness.” You hum in your agreement. At least the other side of things is safe. You think that maybe…it wouldn’t be so bad. Being here. Knowing you accomplished something. Knowing you still aren’t alone even if you’re here.
He eventually requests to go to the water, and soon you feel the cool ocean lapping at your feet.
“…to tell you the truth, I was jealous of you. I wished I could live life the way you do. Just…”
You idly think that your best friend is, actually, kind of an idiot.
“Yeah, well, I’ve got my share of problems, too. Like…wanting to be like you.”
His answer surprises you. The advantage of being him…is having you for a friend? After all this time…but no. It does make sense, doesn’t it? After all…
“I’m okay the way I am. I’ve got something you could never imitate, too.”
A comfortable silence settles over you both. The dark sky wraps around you, the sea breeze over your skin and you think that this is it. If this is what the darkness means…you think you can handle it together.
sometimes...it really is a simple story of two people who care about one another.]
[she continues to stare for a moment longer. she doesn't miss the implication but she is furious because she feels confused, like a comforting rug has been yanked out from under her. finally, though, she'll break eye contact.]
...I am such a fool. [...] I don't see that we have anything else to discuss.
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week 3, tuesday
Good morning, Miss Nonagesimus. A bit of light reading? [thanks for the book.]
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[she chews on her lip, already chapped and red from having been over-chewed.]
How are you faring this week?
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This week has already been a bit...[challenging.] And yourself?
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[she is stressed, but she isn't clarifying.]
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...do we need to debrief?
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[speaking of which, here is a memory]
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this is a lot, and gemini lets it go, watching, observing, processing. it's a little out of their realm of understanding judging by the way they shift almost uncomfortably, but they don't speak yet.
it takes a few moments of silence, arms folded over their chest, before they pick the best thread to start the conversation with.]
...in the end, Harrowhark, was it real or was it a hallucination after all?
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but she takes a deep breath.]
I think he was wrong. I'm not sure how, but I did manage to break into the tomb. [she chews her lip.] In the memory, I realized no one had witnessed me doing so. But that isn't quite right. In this memory, I had forgotten about Gideon. She didn't see what was inside, but...she saw.
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If you believe he was wrong, I assume you are doing everything to prove so. And your first witness is Gideon. [. . .] You remember her now?
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The UWU did something to me that undid what I had done to block her memory.
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...I don't quite understand why you blocked her memory in the first place.
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I suppose I ought to explain. I was among the heirs who was summoned by the Emperor to become a lyctor, one of his immortal saints. We were meant to study, and prove ourselves, and if we came to understand the theory and the tasks, to ascend. The practice, as it turns out, involves the sacrifice of another living soul. The necromancer absorbs the soul in the moments following death, consumes it, and it becomes a replenishing source of power for all eternity. [...] Only one of us was actually willing to pay such an awful cost.
However, the situation became something other than what the Emperor intended. One of his original lyctors did not wish to see the creation of new ones. She began killing us off one by one, before we even understood what was happening. Gideon, she...could see we weren't getting out. So she killed himself, so that I could use her soul and survive that fight.
Which I did. But even so, even knowing she was dead, I didn't want to consume her. I knew I would destroy what was left of her soul even inadvertently. But I'd theorized that I could prevent the process from continuing if my mind did not remember her.
That is why I did it.
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surprisingly though it's not really that hard of a concept to grasp? like yes there's a lot about emperors and necromancy and space stuff they aren't aware of, but the core message is there.]
In a way, both of you sacrificed large pieces of yourself to help one another. In order to survive.
...it seems your theory was correct then? [things. seem betterish.]
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[it is a lot, but yes - it does all come down to that fairly simple story of two people who care about one another.]
It was my goal, at the station, to save her. So...her soul is no longer in any danger from me. I believe she may live again, and may do so even without my intercession, provided my instructions are followed.
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[they seem like they're going to say something else, but this is a convenient time for another smattering of stardust. horrible.
sometimes...it really is a simple story of two people who care about one another.]
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I...this isn't what I expected.
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...consider it irrelevant, Miss Nonagesimus. It isn't anything important.
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[she's staring at them, frowning.]
You didn't talk that way in your memory.
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...No. I know I am insane, and perhaps I would search for something familiar to comfort me and convince myself of it.
But the wording was too specific. The progress reports and debriefings. That's what he would say to me. Why are you pretending to be Miles Edgeworth?
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Miss Nonagesimus...I can only do my job and I am asking you to please ignore what you just saw and follow my lead as before.
[internally, they are screaming "PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP, ACTUALLY."]
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...I am such a fool. [...] I don't see that we have anything else to discuss.
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[they will not stop her from leaving? that is a lot to process.]
...I simply ask that you do not disclose this to anyone else.
[go forth, harrowhark.]
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